Father’s
Day 2009
On Being a Godly Man
Introduction
What
would you say if a man asked your opinion about the feasibility of building a
skyscraper beginning with the second floor? You’d say it was impossible! And of
course you’d be right. You can’t build something on nothing. You can’t build
something in mid air; it has to have something on which to stand. It has to
have a solid foundation. In the case of a skyscraper, the foundation may go to
quite an extraordinary depth in order to support the weight of the
building.
As you
know, today is fathers’ day, and I want to talk to you men in particular about fathering,
but yet I want to talk about fathering only indirectly. I want to talk to you
about something which is foundational to fathering, because fathering is like
building a skyscraper. It can’t be built on nothing. It has to have a
foundation, and the foundation has to go deep; and it’s the foundation I want
to speak to you about this morning.
The
foundation upon which good fathering is built is a godly life. I tell you that
whatever makes a man a good Christian—whatever makes him a godly man—makes him
a good husband and a good father.
This is such
an important point that I want to take some time to stress it. The best means,
men, by which we can become better husbands and fathers, is by becoming better
men. And we become better men by pursuing godliness.
The
apostle Paul wrote to Timothy, his young ministerial apprentice, and said,
Train yourself for godliness;
for while bodily training is of some
value, godliness is of value in every
way, as it holds promise for the present
life and also for the life to come (1 Tim. 4:7-8)
Notice
very carefully that he says, “Godliness…holds promise for the present life.”
It’s not just after we die that godliness is a benefit to us. It’s a benefit
while we live, too. How so? In many ways, not the least of which, by sparing us
the many troubles, heartaches, and regrets that inevitably come as a result of
sin.
Dear
people of God—and young people especially—please hear me now. It is amazing
just how many of our troubles, just how many of our wounds, are self-inflicted.
They come to us as the result of our own folly and sin.
An unbearable burden of debt because we have lacked the
virtue of self-control to live within our means
Relationships that are strained or broken because of our
extreme selfishness and lack of consideration for others
Jobs that we have lost because we have not shown due
diligence in our work
Addictions that have caused us to be enslaved to drugs or
alcohol
Marriages that have ended because we have not guarded our
hearts against improper affections
All of
these hardships and heartaches and troubles—and many others besides—can be
avoided simply by pursuing godliness.
Now I
realize that some difficulties and hardships come upon us by no fault of our
own: cancer is no respecter of persons; crop
losses due to bad weather strike the just and the unjust alike; economic
downturns and the tanking of the stock-market hurt both the godly man and the
ungodly man. But beloved people of God, how many—how many hardships—are self-inflicted wounds! As Solomon says,
The righteousness of the blameless
keeps his way straight (smooth);
but
the wicked falls by his own wickedness.
[Troubles
come upon him because of his sin]
The righteousness of the upright
delivers them,
but
the treacherous are taken captive by their lust (Prov. 11:5-6)
He says
in another place,
The path of the righteous is like the light of dawn,
which shines brighter
and brighter until full day (Prov. 4:18)
And the Lord says
through his servant Isaiah,
The path of the righteous is level;
you make level the way
of the righteous (Isa. 26:7)
Dear
people of God, how many times does the Lord have to say it—and in how many
different ways—before we finally believe it? Things tend to go well for those
who love and obey God, and not so well for those who ignore what he has to say.
This is a fact of life. This is a given.
“Godliness
is valuable in every way for it holds promise for the present life and also for
the life to come.”
This
godliness will make us better men. And in making us better men, it will make us
better husbands and fathers.
There are
many good and helpful books that address the subject of husbanding and
fathering, books that give techniques on how to communicate with your wife, for
instance; or how to discipline your children. These things are good to know.
Undoubtedly they have their place. But we can get off center if we are more
concerned with doing than with being. What I mean by this is: we should not only ask ourselves what a good
husband and father does, but what a
good husband and father is. Being
comes before doing. Doing naturally comes out of being. Jesus said, “Out of the
abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.” And we can say with no less certainty
that out of the abundance of the heart the man acts. As is the heart, so is the
man.
If the
man is a godly man, he’s going to be a good husband and a good father.
But we
must be careful here not to think of the pursuit of godliness merely as a means
to an end. Godliness ought to be pursued as an end in itself. And the result
will be, not only a better husband and a better father, but also a better
friend, a better employee, a better boss, a better citizen—because he’ll be a
better man.
Characteristics of a Godly Man
1. Knowledge of
Divine Things. A godly man has a knowledge of divine things.
There are three broad areas of knowledge I would like to specify: (a) knowledge of Scripture, (b) knowledge of
theological truth, and (c) experiential knowledge.
A. Knowledge of Scripture. A godly man is characterized by a growing
knowledge of the contents of the Bible. Notice that I say growing knowledge. He may not have the contents of the Bible fully
mastered; but he’s on his way to having them mastered. That is, he is committed
to learning and growing in his knowledge of Scripture. He is committed to this
because he recognizes that Scripture is the
very word of the God (1 Thes. 2:13), and therefore “profitable for
teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that
the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work” (2 Tim. 3:16-17).
A godly man knows that what the
Psalmist says is true: “The unfolding of
your word gives light; it imparts understanding to the simple” (Ps. 119:130). He
understands that God’s word is “a lamp to his feet and a light to his path”
(Ps. 119:105). He knows that it is a supernatural word. He knows it deals with
things present and things to come, with things seen and unseen, and that it has
the power in itself, when believed, to transform him into the likeness of
Christ.
Jeremiah expresses the attitude of
the godly man when he says,
Your words were found, and I ate
them,
and
your words became to me a joy
and
a delight of my heart,
for I am called by your name,
O
Lord, God of hosts (Jer. 15:16)
Job also says,
I have not departed from the
commandment of his lips
I have treasured the words of his mouth more
than my portion of food (Job 23:12)
B. Knowledge of theological truth. A godly man has a growing knowledge of the
precious truths of theology. He is growing in his knowledge of Scripture and in the system of theology which
Scripture teaches. He compares Scripture with Scripture in order to know
what the different parts of Scripture teach concerning a given topic. He
doesn’t assume that a study of theology is a study which is only profitable for
pastors and theologians; but because of his hunger and thirst for God, he yearns
for the knowledge of God for himself.
Because of his knowledge of
theological truth, a godly man is not “tossed to and fro by the waves and
carried about by every wind of doctrine” (Eph. 4:14). He is not led astray by cunning
words, by teachers who introduce heresies. Rather, he is “rooted and built
up…and established in the faith” (Col. 2:7), and able to distinguish between
good and evil (Heb. 5:14).
C. Experiential knowledge. A godly man is also characterized by an
experiential knowledge of God. It’s not all head-knowledge; not all book
learning. Rather he lives with God. He walks with Christ. He lives in constant
daily communion with the Holy Spirit. He prays without ceasing. His thoughts
are constantly taken up with divine things. It is as natural for him to pray
and to speak to others of the things of God as it to breathe. He is able to
discern how the Lord is dealing with him. He has a deep experiential knowledge
of God.
2. Trust in God.
A godly man trusts in God. For
a godly man faith is not merely an intellectual exercise, a mere assent to abstract
propositional truth. Rather, faith is a deep personal trust in the person of
God, in God himself—a trust rooted in God’s character, and chiefly his
goodness, power, and wisdom.
A. Faith is a deep personal trust in God’s goodness. This is the basis of all trust, isn’t it? You
can trust people you are convinced are good, can’t you? But you can place
absolutely no confidence whatsoever in people who are bad. The godly man places
confidence in God because of God’s goodness.
B. Faith is a deep personal trust in God’s
power. If God were good, but not
powerful, of what help would he be to us? You might have a kindly old
grandfather who has the will to defend you against an attacker, but not the
strength to do so. You’d credit him for his goodness, but his lack of power is
not something that inspires trust. But the godly man not only trusts that God’s
goodness moves him help him in time of need, but that God has the power to help
also.
C. Faith is a deep personal trust in God’s
wisdom. It is good to know that God
is good. It is good to know that he is powerful. But what are goodness and
power without wisdom to direct their use? How much confidence could you have in
God if he were a good and all-powerful fool?
The godly man has a deep personal
trust in the goodness, power, and wisdom of God. And he reflects this deep
personal trust in God by simple obedience. The fact of the matter is, where
there is a faith of this sort (which is the only kind of true faith there is),
there you find a willing, humble, joyful obedience, which brings us to our next
point.
3. Devotion
to God. The godly man is devoted
to God. This is his ultimate loyalty. He pledges his ultimate allegiance to
God. This is so whether all the world is for God or against him—whether all the
world is following after God or whether all the world is fighting against him.
It’s never a question of where the godly man is going to stand. He’s on God’s side…always. He’s on God’s side against the world. He’s on God’s side
against the flesh (his own flesh). He’s on God’s side against the devil. He’s
on God’s side against his wife (if need be). He’s on God’s side against his
children (if need be).
Jesus
said, “Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and
whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And whoever
loves his own life more than me is not worthy of me” (paraphrase of Matt. 10:37; Luke 14:26).
The godly
man is devoted to God. He will let nothing stand his way of being faithful to
God. Not the world; not the flesh; not the devil; not his wife; not children;
not his friends; not his boss; not the love of life or the fear of death;
neither poverty nor riches. Nothing will stand in his way of being faithful to
God. He is determined. His mind is fixed, because the affection of his heart is
toward God.
And this
brings us to our next characteristic of the godly man.
4. Love
for God. The godly man loves
God—loves him supremely. It’s a love, like the trust that we talked about
earlier, that is rooted in God’s character. The godly man loves God because of
who God is. He has been enabled to see God for who he is, and he is drawn
irresistibly to love him. And he wonders how it is that anyone can not love him.
It is not
that the godly man doesn’t have any other loves, but that his love for God is
supreme. He can say to his wife, “Honey I love you, but I love God more. I love
you more than any being on earth; but I love God more. I am devoted to you and
to the children more than to anything else on this earth; but I am devoted to
God even more.”
And
nothing makes the godly man happier than if she should say the same to him.
And
here’s the ironic thing: it seems
counterintuitive. It seems as though if our love for God is so strong, we will
have less room in our hearts and less strength to love others. But exactly the
opposite is true. The more you love God the better able you will be to love
your wife. The more fully you love God, the more fully you will love her,
because the Lord gives you a greater capacity to love. The more devoted you are
to God the more devoted you will be able to your children. Rather than having
less room in your heart and life for your family, you will have more, far more.
5. Love of
virtue. Another characteristic of
a godly man is that he is a lover of virtue. He is a lover of good. And he
strives to be good, as God is good. He takes pleasure righteousness. He values
a clear conscience before God and before men. He strives to be holy, to be
upright. He aspires to be honest, humble, trustworthy, responsible, kind,
gentle, considerate, self-controlled, peaceful, patient, pure, holy,
praiseworthy, and courageous. He aspires to these things because these things
appear beautiful to him; and their opposites, well they are repulsive.
Conclusion
There are
many other characteristics of godliness we don’t have time to consider, but we
ought to make it our endeavor to search these things out—to pursue godliness by
frequently taking time to meditate on them, and to envision ourselves embodying
these things. See yourself exercising these Christian virtues and graces.
Imagine situations that you are likely to encounter that will put your
character to the test. Think beforehand how to respond. See yourself in your
mind, in your imagination, doing what is right—responding as you should…